It is often said that only those you love can betray you. Meaning how much you love will be directly proportional to how much it will hurt if you are betrayed. So as we meet people and develop relationships, we are faced with the choice to pick those who would become important people in our lives. This is without taking into account the people we meet by chance or fate that end up growing on us.
This choice is a responsibility that’s almost too much to bear because we can’t see into people’s heart and even when we can circumstances occur that could hurt us despite good intentions.
So how should you filter your relationships?
How do you pick friends that won’t betray you?
It’s simply impossible. Not just because we can’t know the intentions people have when they meet us or when we become friends but also because life is dynamic in nature and because change is constant. What was love could become envy, hate, jealousy, loneliness and any of this things can cause betrayal. It could even be unintentional with good thoughts in mind.
Betrayal could even be because of simple human weakness. Like telling a secret to a friend who loves to gossip. You can be assured that it would get out and put a strain on your relationship.
All of this is the glum truth so how do we go from here?
Do we quit on all our relationships just because we are afraid to be betrayed?
Should we take all relationships as business transaction with something to be gained or exchange at the end of it ? (in truth this is a practical way of exterminating the vermin but it is also cold and unfeeling so you decide if you want to take that route)
For the rest who don’t, let me give you a piece of advice
- Understand everyone has a weakness that can be exploited and cause harm even to people they love, once you understand this then you can learn to forgive those who betray you and consider only their intentions. In this way you can decide if they are good for your life or not
- Understanding the weakness of those around you will give you a chance to be considerate about their limitations so you can decide what part of yourself you wish to share with them
- Don’t anticipate a betrayal. Life is hard enough as it is without you being paranoid when it comes to accepting help and love from other people
- Decide to be selfish and distance yourself from those irredeemable friends that wish to only suck up your confidence, love and life